Stuck in Stress Ville

Hey there everyone! ^^ Sorry for not updating in a while. Been stuck in Kota Belud for a LONG TIME which REALLY REALLY REALLY IRRITATES ME TO NO END! So, yeah. Basically, this is the WORST HOLIDAY OF MY ENTIRE LIFE! Seriously, staying  there is not exactly how I planned my ideal holiday would be. Here I thought I’d have a decent holiday of NOT GOING ANYWHERE. Like, seriously. I just wanna stay home and relax. Study at the library where there’s no disturbance. How incredibly beautiful my imagined-ideal-holiday. I was planning on getting a whole lot of things done, but since I’m stuck in the middle of an area where internet connection is literally down the drain, I could get ALMOST NOTHING DONE. This ache my heart SOOO MUCH, I nearly screamed at the top of my lungs. Instead of being able to wind down and de-stress myself, I just got MORE STRESSED OUT! ARGHHHH!!!!!!

*after a few moments of deep inhalation and exhalation and remembering Allah*

I wasn’t planning on pouring things out here, but I can’t help it. Hehe. XD I just need to blow some steam off. I’m well aware that Allah is the greatest of all planners. I trust in His judgement. :) He must be teaching me to be much more patient. Hehe. ^^ Well, I guess that’s it for this entry. See ya guys around! ^^


This is Erna signing out! Tut… Tut…

After AS Ended...

Woah~… I haven’t updated for some time now, eh? Hehe. Anyway, AS exam is OVER! Woohoo! XD Finally! It was time to kick back and relax! One month of joy and fun, here I come! A big NO to that! Unfortunately, or should I say fortunately instead? I prefer fortunately though. Ehem! Anyway, Fortunately, those of the A-Level Ordinary Science have to attend another three weeks of school. Aww~… It doesn’t matter though coz things went pretty well. Classes are over now. YAY! XD For about two weeks only though. XP   

Back to the main point of this entry, I’m just basically gonna talk about what happened AFTER AS exam was over. Here’s a list:

1) After exam was over, the candidates were told that we still have another about three weeks of class, so NO HOLIDAYS. We were like: O_O WHAT IN THE WORLD-. We were surprised. We thought we’d be going for our holidays, but no. Classes await.

2) That night was barbeque night in collaboration with my cousin, Mohd. Idzral Abd Mumin’s birthday! So, yeah. It was kinda a last minute thing coz my parents do not remember my cousin’s birth date although they were well informed about his birth month. My father got a Tiramisu cake for my cousin. He said the clerk at a bakery told him that since he was turning 16, an age of sophistication, was it? I’m not sure myself, but I do remember my father saying Tiramisu would fit best! Hehe. ^^ My 21-year-old nephew got carbonated drinks as instructed by my mother and my aunt prepared the wet ingredients that were going to be barbequed that night. we had barbequed chicken, fish and squid that night. I didn’t go out though. I stayed inside until all of my cousin’s friends were gone coz I felt like a fever was coming that caused me to feel ever so weak and LAZY to get out of the room I was in and eat. A perfectly SOLID reason to as why I didn’t have a chance of even having a bite of the Tiramisu cake. Huhu. It’s okay though, I’m not into cakes. Besides, my father got me and my siblings some slices of two different types of cheese cakes. *gulped in fear* TRUST ME. The cakes were VERY cheesy! Haha! Seriously! You see, I have this problem of not being able to eat much cheese and mayonnaise. So, the cheese cakes almost made me vomit. I couldn’t handle the cheese. The cheese itself was kinda nice, but what made eating the cake unbearable was the foundation of the cheese cakes. IT TASTED STRANGE. My sister who’s a die-hard-lover of cheese cakes GAVE UP eating ONE SLICE of cheesy goodness!!! Imagine a cheese-tolerant person like me having one?! Nevermind, the point is it was a great barbeque night! Hehe. ^^v

3) The next day, my sister, younger brother and I went to 1Borneo to watch Rise of the Guardians~. Haha! IT. WAS. AWESOME!!! The movie was funny, hilarious in fact, cool and very entertaining. It was just plain awesome. I even got myself a new bag which I intended on using whenever I’m going to hangout or go for an outing and such. But I ended up having it as my school bag instead. Haha~. Anyways, so yeah. We had fun watching the movie, we went to see some CDs. TO BUY some CDs to be exact, checked out some books at Harris and eat at McDonald’s. Overall rating of the day: 5 STARS! Thank you Allah for blessing us with such a great day!

4) Since, it has been a while, I don’t exactly remember when we went shopping for school stuff. Hmmm… Anyway, then, we got some new things from Servay Hypermall! Woots! Hehe. ^^ The workers were like SO BUSY getting things in place. So, my siblings and I were like the first people to actually browse through the brand new stuff of school supplies. They were actually getting ready for “Back-to-School” event where customers would rush in at the last minute to buy their children stationary for school. My sister and I were the only two that ended up buying what we needed coz I had school remember, so yeah. I had no choice whereas my sister was buying whatever she needed so that she wouldn’t have to rush later. Besides, she had a lot of schoolwork to do, but she’s running low on supplies. Highlighters dried out, empty correction tapes, ink-less pens, rocky rulers (if you know what I mean) and bits of eraser. How can she study like that, right? Hahaha! XD

5) On Monday (26/11/2012), CLASS EXTENSION commenced. Yes, the classes were actually extensions. It was supposed to be holidays, but for some good and solid reasons, the college decided to have class extensions. Just in those 14 days of studying (3 Mondays, 3 Tuesdays, 3 Wednesdays, 3 Thursdays and 2 Fridays), we had 2 Chemistry small tests (I missed one coz I was at Kota Belud), 1 Biology test, 1 Statistics test and 1 Pure Mathematics test. Phew! I was absent for two days. One on the 2nd Thursday and the other on the 3rd Monday. I was sick on Thursday. I was down with a fever and I was still at Kota Belud on Monday coz a distant family member died the night before, so my mother suggested that we stayed so that she and my father could go to the funeral. So yeah. Anyways, overall rating: 3 STARS! Not bad, eh? Hehe. Only three coz there’s SO MUCH TESTS. Haha~. X’D I don’t like tests. It puts me into extra pressure. I’ve got too much pressure already anyway. Like, seriously. Whatever we learned on a particular day, I’D BE SURE TO REVISE AND TRY TO DO SOME EXERCISE ON IT THAT VERY DAY. Whenever there were free periods, don’t expect me to be at the Student Lounge. I’d be busy rewriting, updating and fixing my notes, going through some exercises and revising on what we have learned. My determination and commitment towards my study seemed to have like multiply by tenfold RIGHT AFTER the AS exam was over for some reason. Maybe one of the factor is coz I made a strong resolved to work harder THRICE HARDER than I did during AS. Although I felt like I worked my butt off for AS, I don’t think it’s enough. I need to push myself to the limit and at the same time not to forget to wind down every evening or during the weekends. I learned one important lesson from my classmates at Institute Sinaran:


I noticed that they spend some time to relax and hangout during the weekends. Even during the weekdays actually, but only in the late evening or night though. Most of which is different than me who always try to spend soooo much time studying with not much rest. In other words, I’m thankful for this important lesson. I applied this during my one month over of AS exam and during the three weeks of class extension. It made a big difference. One lesson was all that it take to make my days run much more smoothly and in a much better way. Thank you S1A, S1B, S1C and S1D of 2012 for teaching me this! I appreciate it. No wonder you guys are top students. You smarty-pants! Haha! XD

Hmmm… I think that’s about it. Hehe. ^^ I’ll be sure to post an entry on the AS exam later on. Right now, time for HARD WORK. Hehe. ^^ See ya later in the next posts to come! ^^


This is Erna signing out! Tut… Tut…

Onegaishimasu! >...<

First off, to clear things up for you guys:

You see, I created another blog called "A Hidden Passion". Basically, the blog is ALL about my passion for writing. Meaning to say that, the blog only contains the stories that I originally made myself. Yeah, I know it's weird since I'm studying to be a doctor, but I'm writing stories. Haha! XD Actually, writing is one of the only things I'm KINDA (just kinda) good at. SERIOUSLY. I'm not good at a lot of things, so you can see why I'm so VERY glad to have at least ONE THING I'm kinda good at. Anyway, why PLEASE as an entry title? Well, ermmm... Frankly speaking, I'd like to ask for A LITTLE help if you don't mind. Would any of you mind visiting the blog even if it's just for once? Maybe if you're diligent enough, share the blog with your friends? Well, I'm planning on publishing a book while I still have time to write. Of course, I want my book to be selling good coz if not, I'm not the only one dissapointed. The publishers who wasted so much money to publish my book and the readers who vomitted over and over because of the SOOOOO bad story will suffer. I don't want that! TT____TT I want my book to bring a pinch of happiness or maybe a little joy and laughter to fellow readers. I can't change the world. BUT, I can bring a little happiness and smile to their faces, right? RIGHT? So, yeah. Help me out here, PLEASE! ONEGAISHIMASU, minna-san! >....< In order to write a good story, I need feedbacks. So, yes. PLEASE. From the bottom of my heart, please help. Even if only for a little bit. Thank you everyone! :')

Oh! Almost forgot! Here's the link:
Please at least have a look or a peek would be okay too! >...<
Okay, I know. I sound desperate. Eww. Disgusting. I can't believe it. XP
This is Erna signing out! Tut... Tut... 

A Story: This Is My Ninja Way!

YES! You bet! It's about ninjas! Hehe. XD Well, not exactly 100% about ninjas though. It's kinda mixed with magic. Hehe. I'm still working on the story. Although I've posted chapter one and chapter two on already, I'm planning on rewriting it. Like, SERIOUSLY I think my vocabulary was kinda limited back then. Even the sentence structure bothers me in some parts of the two chapters. ANYWAY~, in this entry, I'm going to talk a little bit about the story. Maybe it'll attract your attention? Hehe. ^^

The story is set in a world where ninjas roam. It's actually a fan fiction story, meaning to say that the story is set based on a show or book or any other things that I read or watched. In this case, the story is set in the world of the anime NARUTO~. Haha! XD Sounds cliche? Or maybe retarded? Sorry about that, I guess that's just me. ;)

Moving on, the main character of my story is a girl. A human girl who holds a WHOLE LOT of responsibilities. This will later be revealed. Hehe. I have SOOO MANY things running crazy around in my head! Hahahaha!!!! XD XD XD Sorry, sorry. I got offside again. Ehem. I'll talk about the character a bit later. By the way, the girl's name is Zara.

Well then, Zara was in the world of Naruto trying to solve a certain problem she's facing at the moment. She's trying to figure a way out to solve it. She did EVERYTHING she could think of with the little clue she was given. She settled in the village where Naruto (the main character of the anime Naruto lived), hunt for enemy ninjas threatening the village and even going as far as pretending to join the dark side of the ninja world just so she could solve this certain problem of hers.

Then, one faithful day, something unexpected happened. A dark force only she was familiar with found out where Zara was and followed her to the world she was in. Then, you just have to read to know what will happen next. Hehe. You might as well just read this entry without having to read the story if I told you everything right? Hehe. I hope that attracts your attention? Even for a little bit? So, please check out the story later when I post it and let me know what you think of it, okay? Thanks in advance, everyone! ^^

This is Erna signing off! Tut... Tut...

Institute Sinaran

Okay then. I should've posted an entry about my college earlier but the idea totally didn't cross my mind. It just did when I realized I haven't talked about my college yet. Haha! XD Anyway, the college I'm in is as the title states above, Institut Sinaran or Sinaran Institute. It provides you can say adequate facilities and the lecturers are EXTREMELY helpful. That is of course in my point of view. They help students a lot! Hehe. XD

Moving on, the institute is a five-storeys building.

Yes, the view from the bottom. Haha! XD

The institute provides adequate facilities. Here's some photos with captions regarding the facilities provided at the institute:

First and foremost, of course the LECTURE HALL~. Haha! XD There are two lecture halls at the institute. Both located at the fifth floor. I'm not sure if the Lecture Theatre is considered as a different room from the Lecture Hall. If I'm not mistaken, yes. So, there's one Lecture Theatre at the institute. Come for a visit to make sure. Haha! XD
And of course, for smaller groups or for Group Hour and Tutorials (I'll explain these later), there are classrooms available. ^^ Normally, the room for each group is fixed by the institute so the groups won't overlap. Err, well something like that. Hehe. ^^"
The institute also has two computer labs. Normally, students use Computer Lab 2 though. There's internet connection and students are trusted to use the net for study purposes and NOT social networking, such as Facebook, Friendster, Tagged and other social networks WHICH is another reason why I like the institute coz I can have a little privacy doing my work instead of having someone somewhat breathing down my neck looking at what I'm doing. Haha! XD
The institute has six labs for science students to perform experiments. Two labs for each science subject.
Yes, this is one of the Biology labs. To be precise, this is Biology Lab 2.
This is one of the Chemistry labs. This is Chemistry Lab 2.
Lastly, this is one of the Physics lab. This is Physics Lab 2, I think. I haven't gone to Physics' labs for a while now coz I dropped the subjects months ago.  
And of course the institute provide a library for students to occupy during their free periods. You can find me here for free periods most of the time. Sometimes I'd go to the musalla or surau to study and pray. Hehe. ^^
Like a little bit more privacy, don't worry, there are carrels for you to use. XD
Ah~ yes. There are two more facilities for students to rest and just hang out for a while.

The Cafeteria and Student Lounge are located at the first floor. But, sorry to say that the cafeteria does not provide halal food, so yes. You have to bring your own home made food OR you can go to McDonald's which is VERY NEAR to the institute. Haha! XD Oh yeah! There's a Service Centre as well. You can photocopy books, notes or any other study materials at a low price. ;) Hehe. ^^ Did I mention you can buy some stationery too? To girls, when you're facing one of those oops-my-pants-are-all-red incident, they sell some of those too, just in case when you're facing such emergencies. Hehe. ^^
And lastly, unfortunately I can't find a single picture of it on the net, the institute provides a musalla or surau for Muslim students to perform their prayers. Muslim students are also allowed to be late for 5-10 minutes for the class after lunch time if they do not have enough time to perform their prayers in some inevitable cases. Don't make it a habit though. Make sure to inform your lecturers beforehand so that they know why you're late.
I guess that's about it. Hehe. XD Oh yeah! One more thing, this is how the institute looks like from afar:

So, if you drive to school, there's actually car parks provided especially for students. Just make sure you ask for the sticker thingy from Madam Amy Lee at the reception counter so that you are allowed to park at the student car parking area. Hehe. ^^

Now, allow me to explain a few things about what's going on at the college. First off, students are given into groups depending on the courses their taking and the number of students that applied for a particular course. Since the GCE A-Level Ordinary Science programme is the most popular programme and has the highest numbers of students applying for, I'll take this as an example. Altogether, the number of students of the programme is about 120. The students are first divided based on the subjects their taking. Then, they are split based on this. Let's say the number of students taking the same subjects are too much that it reaches 80 or so students, then they'll be split into smaller groups. For the 2011 batch, there are four groups. There are S1A, S1B, S1C and S1D. Those who are taking Further Mathematics or Law instead of Biology will be placed in S1A. Phew! I hope now you understand how students are split into smaller groups. In elementary and high school, we call the groups as "classes".
Next, the institute have Group Hour and Family Hour. Group Hour is a time when each group will occupy a room and basically discuss about the upcoming events or have certain pairs of students to present something to the group. The Family Hour is a time where ALL the members of the institute will gather at the hall and hear a talk, watch a video, etc.. Normally, a talk by a famous person or a notable person will be organized especially for students. Once, Hong Yi or her nickname, Red came for a talk. She talked about her inspirations and such. She even showed us a music video that was NOT RELEASED YET to us. We were the first viewers to have watched it. How lucky~? Hehe. ^^ Tutorials are times where you'll do some problem solving exercises for further understanding of the subject at hand. Hehe. ^^
The institute organizes a lot of events too. Students are of course the important drive for this. Lecturers are just advisors, the rest is up to the students. Ermmm.... What else? Hmmm.... I guess that's just about it. Hehe. ^^ For more info, please click this link here:
This is Erna signing out! Tut... Tut...

Wait the minute!!! O_O

I just realized something! Why the heck did I write:

This is Erna signing OFF! Tut... Tut...
when obviously my mind was shouting:
This is Erna signing OUT! Tut... Tut...
Astaghfirullah-al-azim...  =.=" 

My Life as a Student at Institute Sinaran...

Hey there, everyone! ^^ I haven't updated, for that I'm truly sorry! Been very busy ever since December 2012. This is actually a post I wanted to publish last year, but since my schedule was pretty tight, I got no choice but to delay it. Anyway, the title says it all. I'm going to basically just talk about what my life was and is like in IS. You might find this post to be boring and uninteresting and you know as well as I do, you don't have to force yourself to read it. Well, this is A Day in My Life... As we're well informed, every life has their ups and downs. :) Anyways~, carry on! ^^

Here in IS, classes start as early as at eight o' clock in the morning for every weekdays. A normal class session would last for an hour and the shortest considering if there are any events going on, then classes will be either 50 minutes or 45 minutes long only. Depending on the course you're taking and which group you are in, the lastest classes will end for the day would be 4.00-4.30 p.m. Normally at about 5.00 p.m. no students will be around anymore. Believe me, the school looks deserted around that time. Let's just say, I experienced it before. My class ended at 4.00 p.m. but my parents picked me up at about 6 o' clock in the evening! I remember the CEO Madam Lim Khoon Chin jokingly said to me to get my parents buy me a car to drive to and fro college. Haha~...

Back to the main topic, let's see... Hmm... In the morning, I'd have classes until about 10.00 a.m. There will be a 20 minutes break and I'd take this opportunity to either go to the washroom, halal canteen or revising my studies. When class commences, back to STUDY MODE~. Haha! XD Anyways, at about 12.20 p.m. I'd either be having my lunch (that is if I didn't eat during the 20 minutes break) or pray at the musolla. The only place in the whole college I can truly unwind and forget about my problems. Although sad to say, the musolla is quite bare, it still has a cosy feeling to it. A place where I feel more collected and at peace for some reason. Nowadays, I'd study and do my revisions more frequently at the musolla instead of the library. There's nothing wrong studying in the musolla right? Since the function of musollas in the first is not to just pray, but also for religious discussions or better known as usrahs, studying, reading and other beneficial activities.

Told you, the post would be boring! Hehe. This is MY LIFE in IS. I'd focus as much as I can when class is in session, pray when it;s time and eat during breaks whenever I feel gastritis would attack me. And that's basically it! Haha! XD My life in IS may seem boring and relaxing, but in truth it's not. My schedule is extremely tight and hectic, sometimes I feel a fever's coming, but I survive nonetheless. Hmmm... I'm not sure what else I can talkl about, so yeah. I'll just end things here.

This is Erna signing out! Tut... Tut... Tut...

SPM 2012 is coming~....

Woah~... I can't believe it's almost one year since I took SPM. Haha! XD I was kind of reluctant to post anything about SPM at first coz I thought:

"Please. It's not like anyone's gonna read them. I'm not a star student after all..."
Yup! That's exactly what I was thinking about. After a while of blog-walking and all, I noticed that a majority of the bloggers I followed and some that my friends followed were blogging about SPM, exam fever and such. I felt kinda bad for not AT LEAST sharing one or two things that I did before SPM. Although I wasn't and still not a star student, but I managed to get a result that was far beyond my expectation and normal results. So, without further ado, allow me to share a few things about what I did before SPM, during SPM and after SPM.


Since SPM will be in  the next few days, here's what I did:

1) I TOTALLY de-stressed myself. Meaning to say that I did not do any heavy studying, such as burning the midnight oil, studying individually and completing exercises non-stop. I noticed that some people do this which is a big NO NO NO to our mental, spiritual and physical condition. Remember to get enough sleep, that is at least six hours and the most eight. This is coz when one lack of sleep, they tend to feel tired, exhausted even to the point that it causes physical stress to the body that may lead to a fever. Lack of sleep also promotes cold and flu as the body's immune system are weakened due to inadequate rest. This will eventually cause us to be mentally disturbed (I don't mean by going crazy or anything) and uneasy about the "approaching" SPM. Later on, our conscience will be filled with negative thoughts that will slowly poison our minds and eventually cause us to lose confidence. So, that means;

Heavy studying = BIG NO
2) Go through short notes and just do light revision instead. This will help you feel collected, calm and less stressed out, BUT still keep you supposedly "in tact" with your studies. Studying hard is not ALWAYS good, sometimes it's bad so stick to light ones ESPECIALLY when you're just a few days away from facing the real deal.

3) Let's say while going through your cute-mini-notes, you suddenly realized that:

Haha! Let me tell you, I had one of those days too, but DON'T WORRY! You can still master that particular topic. First off, the moment you realized that you are still not very clear about a certain concept, please follow these simple rules:

  • RULE NUMBER 1: Relax. Chill~. Take a deep breath and be calm.
  • RULE NUMBER 2: Set your alarm clock to wake up at 3 o'clock in the morning.
  • RULE NUMBER 3: Continue doing your light revision.
  • RULE NUMBER 4: Make sure you sleep early. If possible, get yourself in bed by 10.
  • RULE NUMBER 5: Wake up, brush your teeth or shower if you have to and start studying your butt off on that topic you haven't completely understand yet. It's advisable to drink a cup of coffee or tea so that the caffein can get your brain running. And as for Muslims, please perform the hajat sunnat prayers (solat sunat hajat) for a calm, and "lesson-absorbing-mind".
You might go:
Tsk tsk tsk. Let me explain. The brain is the organ which controls ALL of our sensory organs. I'm not sure whether you are aware or not, but we would always hear such inspiring stories of blind people who become teachers by learning through braille, people who got their hands decapitated that produce fine masterpieces by painting with their feet and many others that touches the heart. Notice how when one organ is "immobile" or "inactive" another one seem to shine? When we try to read braille by touch, we'll find it diffcult to read and understand despite memorizing the patterns which represent the letters they represent clearly. This is because, blind people who do not use their eyes for seeing, will get some other parts of their sensory organs (in this case, the sense of touch) enhanced due to the brain not having to use any of its "energy" to see, hence dispersing a fixed amount of energy to less sensory organ than normal. Meaning to say that, they have a much more sensitive sense of touch than us who fully utilizes all the sensory organs. This is the exact reason why it is as easy as pie for blind people to read braille by touch compare to us. What I mean to say is that, when we wake up at three in the morning to study, your surrounding will be much quieter as everyone is still asleep, hence your ears are "inactive" meaning that your brain will disperse its "energy" to the ears less compare to the rest. This will greatly benefit you, in terms that your eyes will be much more alert, your hands lighter than usual and your brain much more focused. Besides that, when you just woke up from a good quality sleep, you'll feel fresh and relax which is VERY ESSENTIAL in helping you to understand what you're studying. Studying at this kind of hour allows your brain to absorb lessons efectively, like that of a sponge. Hehe. ^^  Now do you understand why it's good and benificial to study at three o'clock in the morning? I know the explanation may have contained too much long sentences (negehehhee) but I bet you still could understand what I mean right? HAHAHA!!!

4) Lastly,

Yes! This is VERY important, so don't forget to go and ask for forgiveness! God, helps to make things easier for people who seek forgiveness from Him and the people surrounding them.


Ah yes. Even with all that knowledge already stuck in your brain and your confidence as that of a raging fire, worry still pangs your heart. *Sigh* As a result, you are studying till the last drop of blood. I TOTALLY do not agree with this when facing big exams like SPM. Trust me, this will only cause your confidence to evaporate ever so slowly which is BAD! My advice:

1) Read the Yaasin and ayatul-kursi for calmness. For non-Muslim, please pray for a heart that is calm and strong no matter what tidalwave that hits you during the exam.

2) Get a glance through your short notes. You never know what information that get stuck in your brain due to last minute studying.

3) During the last 30 minutes, go for a short toilet break. Relieve yourself, wash your face, etc.

4) For the last 20 minutes before the exam starts, STOP reading anything or touching any books that are related t the subject you're sitting for. By this time, get your things ready and stay cool and calm. Tawakal fully to God, meaning to say competely surrender eerything to God. You have been working hard for a solid 22 months, so God will know best what to reward you foryour hard work. Trust in God's judgement. Even if you don't get the result you wished for, don't lose faith in God because that means He has a bigger and better plan for you n the future, so keep striving!


FREEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hehe. ^^ My advice is that you forget about SPM completely and start planning for the future for a bit. Besides that, don't forget to study even if it's only for a tinsy-wittle-bit for a firm grasp on what you've studied in Form 4 and Form Five so that you don't have to struggle too much in the future. Most importantly, have fun spending your holidays! :)

PHEW!!! That was a lot! Ah yes. Then again, these tips may only be useful if you did work hard to cover all the topics of your subjects. If not, then I guess my ONE and ONLY advice, PUMP IT TO THE LIMIT! Only when SPM is day away from you, then stop studying like there's no tomorrow. Hehe. Anyway, good luck everyone! May your hard work be paid off and may God grants you your wishes! ^^

This is Erna signing off! Tut... Tut...

Dear God...

Dear GOD,
Why am I so down lately?
My fingers ain’t agile as before,
My brain is not as alert as it was
And my heart not as strong as it used to be…
Dear GOD,
If I got lost,
Shrouded by darkness,
Devoured by evil,
Cloaked with coldness,
Please show me to the right way,
I’m too afraid to be lost in this forest,
Too many paths to choose from,
Each with different consequences,
Help me pick the right path.
Dear GOD,
If I ever did anything wrong,
Please forgive me,
You are the only one who forgives my mistakes,
Humans take a long time to forgive,
Even if the mistakes I made was of an ant,
You are the only ONE I may turn to,
The ONLY ONE I “can” turn to.
Dear GOD,
If everybody else isolates me,
Please don’t leave me by the roadside,
I can’t stand the emptiness I feel inside,
I can’t handle the chill it sends to my body,
I can’t bear the pain it transmits to my heart.
Dear GOD,
Even if I act like a foolish scumbag,
Please do not hate me,
Show me to the right path instead,
Give me signs,
So that one day when death calls,
I’ll finally be able to see Your face,
The most rewarding gift to Muslims of all…

I made this one up years ago, but I fixed just A BIT here and there. Hehe. ^^
"So shut up about “destiny” and “inescapable fate”….You shouldn’t whine about such trivial stuff! Cause… unlike me… you’re not a FAILURE."

"The past is the past. We cannot indulge ourselves in memories and destroy the present."

"There’s no such thing as a painless lesson. They just don’t exist. Sacrifices are necessary. You can’t gain anything without losing something first although if you can endure that pain and walk away from it, you’ll find that you now have a heart strong enough to overcome any obstacle. Yeah, a heart made fullmetal."

"Lying tears hurt others, lying smiles hurt one’s self"

I said that? O_O

"People say I’m stupid, I agree. But, that’s never the reason for me to stop in the middle of the race I know I might lose. Coz I know someday I won’t be the last person to cross the finishing line. If I keep on going without looking back, I believe I’ll be the person I dream of being."
I never knew I was so full of motivation before. HAHAHA!!! XD XD XD Seriously, I never knew that. Haha! XD Well, I guess this was true back then. :) Coz I'm no longer a 'racer' that's always trying to fulfil social expectations of the people around her. I'm now a fighter. A PROUD one too... :') Still have to fulfil social expectations, but not bothering a single thing that they say when I don't though. Dang! It's sooo hard to explain in words! Hahahaha!!!! XD XD XD

"I don't race, I FIGHT!" 

Let's talk about CDs~!!! Ngehehe...

Alright then, let's talk about CDs this time. Hehe. Actually, I wanted to do an entry on my other books BUT they're just too much to the point that I might take an hour or so just to take pictures. Haha! XD So, yeah. Brush that idea off. I'm gonna do it much much later on. For now, I'll do on the CDs that I collected so far. My sister has tons more actually. Haha! XD So, yeah, anyway, back to the point of this entry. I'm just gonna list some CDs here so bear with me! And ONCE AGAIN, I'm so VERY sorry about the low quality of the pictures. Remember the power saver bulbs I talked about last time? Well, yes. I'm in a room where the light shoots the spot where I took the front covers of the CDs DIRECTLY. HAHAHA! XD I was too heck lazy to find some other spots, so YES. Please bear with me people. ;) Anyway, moving on, here's some of the CDs I collected so far:


Hiiro no Kakera
Ouran High School Host Club
Detective School Q

Princess Princess
Clamp School Detectives
Ao no Exorcist (Blue Exorcist)
Starry Sky
Kuroko no Baske

Hakuoki Shinsengumi Kitan
Hakuoki Shinsengumi Kitan 2
Kuroshitsuji II (Monoshitsuji)

Pokemon The Movie 2008: Dialga VS Palkia VS Darkai
Pokemon: Lucario and the Mystery of Mew
Detective Conan 13 in 1 Movie Collection
Kuroshitsuji OVA 1 - 6
Gintama Shinyaku Benizakuza-hen
The Light of a Firefly Forest
Saiyuki Reload Gunlock Complete Collection
Vampire Knight Season 1 - 2
Darker Than Black Season 1 + 2
Code Geass Season 1 & 2

Howl's Moving Castle
Princess Mononoke

Barbie: A Mermaid Tale 2
Barbie: The Princess and The Popstar
My Boss, My Hero!
Death Note (Movie 1)
Death Note: L Change the World (Movie 3)
I Am Number Four
The Hunger Games
Resident Evil: Afterlife
Men In Black 3 (MIB3)
P/S: Perhaps the Barbie movies there made any of you laugh? Haha! XD It sure made my sister laugh. XD XD XD
PHEW! That's it! ^^ I think... ?_? Hahaha! XD Anyway, so this is basically some of the CDs I collected thus far. I'm still expanding my collection SLOWLY... Hehe. I haven't actully watch most of the CDs coz I'm just WAY too busy to watch any of them. Haha. I'm working on it though. I have a sister you see, so yeah. Only when both of us have any free time do we watch our CDs which explains why we're going rather slow. *Sigh* Imawa tonikaku, I might be posting on more books next or perhaps a book review on The Kneebone Boy? Hehe. I haven't decided yet.
Ah yes! I'm actually still a candidate of an exam and my next paper will be on 5th November. I'm SOOO glad about this coz at least I can take a LITTLE break and perhaps watch a few CDs? ;) Hehe. Wish me luck and please pray for my success dear viewers no matter who you are so that I may get satisfying results! Thank you in advance to those who do. I think that's it about my "Stash of CDs". Hehe. See you guys in the next entries to come! ^^
This is Erna signing off! Tut... Tut...

More BOOKS!!! XD

Maybe you can already guess what the title means? Hehe. If you guessed I stole some expensive and interesting books from Times Bookstore, Popular Bookstore or Harris Bookstore, then you're gravely mistaken. Haha! XD I actually bought some awesome (in my opinion though) books from the said bookstores! Hehe. It's actually been a while but high-school-oriented college made sure I was well away from my laptop to do any updating in this little blog of mine. I can't believe I'm seeing spider webs in this blog again! Damn it~... *starts dusting here and there*

Haha! XD Well, anyway~ I'm gonna talk about more books! Basically, I'm just gonna list some of them here. I actually got LOADS more, but there's just TOO MUCH for this post. I'll try my best to post one about the other books. In this entry, however, I'll only talk about the books I found interesting and might be worth reading. I haven't read them yet, but I soon will once the second semester is over and more importantly my AS Exam is over! Anyway, here ya go:
Okay, this isn't exactly a book I bought. This is a book that a friend gave me and I feel SOOO BAD for not being able to read till now. Huhuhu... TT____TT








Phew! Maybe you noticed the kinda bad quality of the pictures? Sorry about that guys. The lights in the room I'm currently in is VERRRRYYYYYYY BRIGHT. Haha! XD My whole house is using the power saver bulbs to help save the Earth and save my family some money in the long run. Hehe. ^^
Anyway, back to the main topic of this entry, so yeah. These are just some of the books I got myself. I don't know why I'm SOOO IN LOVE with books! Hehe. Oh yeah! There's this book I got just a few days ago. No longer than three days ago to be exact! I just TOTALLY LOVE the book! Like, SERIOUSLY! I NEVER had a favourite coz basically I just LOVE all kinds of books. Throw me one and you might find me engrossed in the book within seconds. Hehe. Anyhow, here's the book:
This is the only new book that I finished reading and it's the newest too! I wanted to read the older ones first but something about this book drawed me to it like a magnet. I couldn't resist the temptation and started reading straight away! I finished reading it at about 2.40 a.m. if I'm not mistaken. It was right after finishing the book did I realized that I just totally love the story and that I was hoping there's a sequel to the awesome story. If there was, dare I say I would have immediately get off my bed and ran to ANY bookstore that are still open to look for the sequel, but deep down I know there's no sequel to it. It's okay though, at least it had a great ending. :") <-- tears welled up in eyes
Haha! XD So, yeah. To know what the story is all about, you just have to search for it in the net. I might spoil the story for you guys. Oh! I forgot to mention, my favourite character from the story is the guy in the middle. Hehe. You'll know when you read the book. I highly recommend this book to anyone who would like to read a book packed with bizarreness, suspense, family love and mysteries of course! ^^ Ngehehehehe....  Anyway, it's late, so I better turn in. Hehe. Night everyone! ;) Hope to see you guys in the next posts to come! ^^
This is Erna signing off! Tut... Tut...

AS Examination 2012

Damn it~... Yeah, people. Just a few weeks left and AS will officially commence. Life's been stressful and tiring lately due to loads of "family events". Let you guys know in future entries, insya-Allah. Anyway, so yes. I'm going to face this AS exam on the 15th of October 2012. My last paper will be on 22nd of November. Imagine that? Woah~. More than a month of exams, but of course there are lots of gaps in between which is a relief. Although I want to get the exam over with, I still want to do my best. If I don't get straight a's, then I have to repeat the exam next year. A total waste of time and money! NO WAY am I gonna repeat! It will be too tiring~... Hehehe...

Anyway, the timetable's out. I'm not sure which one will be easier for you to read, so yeah that's why there are two timetables there. Hehe. In any case, take a look at it (or should I say them? Hehe) :

The highlighted, ticked and signed papers are the ones that I'll be answering. Huhu... TT_____TT

So yeah. As you can see, I'm only taking three subjects, which are Biology, Chemistry and Mathematics. Just in case you guys are feeling lazy to look at the subjects I'm taking and maybe confused looking at the timetable, let me make things a whole lot simpler. OBSERVE. Hehe. ^^

I'm going to answer these papers:

1) Biology: Paper 1 (MCQ), Paper 2 (Structured questions), Paper 3 (Practical paper)
2) Chemistry: Paper 1 (MCQ), Paper 2 (Structured questions), Paper 3 (Practical paper)
3) Mathematics: Paper 1 (Pure Maths), Paper 6 (Statistics)

So, basically I'm going to sit for eight papers in total. If I hadn't drop Physics, I'd be sitting for 11 papers instead. XP

Anyhow~... Wish me luck people! Oh, and pray for my success too. Hehe. I am totally gonna need all the luck especially prayers I can get! Huhu.

This is Erna signing off! Tut... Tut...
Okay then, I've been thinking lately and I thought that my blog needs something useful posted in it. So, like yeah~... I've been thinking and all. I came to NOTHING unfortunately. Then, I started thinking again and suddenly I started singing a song while doing my homework AND thinking of ideas for my blog. Can I be a good multitasker you know? Hahaha!!! XD Anyway, I'm posting this to say that:


Where we are now...

Okay, maybe the title doesn't really suit this entry, but what the heck. Hehe. ^^ Anyway~, I actually was kinda drained out of ideas for short entries. So, yeah. I didn't post anything for a long time. I can actually see some dust here and there. And oooo~~~... SPIDER WEBS! Ngehehe. XD Okay, okay, sorry. I was joking. Back to the main point of this entry. "Where we are now" in the title of this post and you might think that I'm going to talk about the college I'm in and what I'm doing there and such, but NO. I'm not gonna talk about that. What I mean here is that, I'm going to talk about the environment or nature or just Earth. Hehe.

Okay then, WHY do I want to write about the Earth all of a sudden? Well, this VERY SHORT story goes like this: When I logged on Facebook, I noticed that I have some notifications. One of it was about MAX LIM SING CHEE who posted something in our class group called S1B INSTITUT SINARAN 2012. Just so you know, the group's name is in capital letters, so yeah. I wasn't trying to emphasise on anything there. Anyway~, after that I went to check out what he posted. Maybe it's about something important about the group or maybe a VERY important announcement to remind people of something. But it turned out that he was just actually asking for help. He asked if we could "Like" his two photos that got into the final round of Institut Sinaran Photography Competition 2012 in conjunction to Environmental Day 2012. Oh, before I continue on, check out this link to see the other contestants pictures coz I only downloaded Max's XD:

TWO of his photos got into the finals. I repeat, TWO of his photos got into the finals! Hehe. You'll know that if you checked out the link from earlier. ;) Anyway, his photos were AWESOME! I was inspired to write about nature because of his photos. Here's two of his photos that got into the finals WITH the caption of the photos:

"THE ONLY LAST TREE" by Lim Sing Chee

Trees are the earth's endless effort to speak to the listening heaven. when we use the tree respectfully and economically, we have one of the greatest resources of the earth.


"FLAGS OF NATURE" by Lim Sing Chee

Tree is a value that spans generations, we must protect the forests for our children, grandchildren and those who can't speak for themselves such as the animals and the trees.

So yeah, there you have it. Okay! Enough about my source of inspiration for this post. NOW, I'm gonna talk about what I'm inspired to post about. First off, do any of you realize that in this modern era, the areas of forests and green fields are depleting, as in getting smaller and smaller? Of course you do, right? Whenever we take a look around, we'll only see buildings, concrete, roads, bridges, apartments and shopping complexes! Well, maybe when you're not in Sabah that is coz here in Sabah you can actually see quite a lot of green in certain areas. Anyhow, even if there are some trees and green in the city, most of the time you'll see them as some sort of decoration. You know what I mean, right? There are just there for the purpose of making either the side roads look nice or just the buildings look "green-friendly". You get what I mean, right?

I think everyone knows that the green plants, like the leaves of trees and the grass are the ones that give out oxygen and not air-conditioners that release chlorofluorocarbon (CFC) that depletes the ozone layer!

We should increase the number of trees instead of the number of air-conditioners!
We should preserve forest and green fields instead of demolishing them for self-gain!
We should reduce, reuse and recycle; NOT use, use more and throw!

Don't take things for granted. Cherish for what we have now! We are pretty lucky to be able to see tigers, pandas, leopards, jaguars, black panthers, exotic birds and sooo many more creatures that MIGHT be extict in the future due to our selfish acts. Remember, they live in the forest. Either in a cave surrounded by tall majestic trees or among the trees themselves. We are all connected in cycles. The oxygen cycle, the carbon dioxide cycle, the water cycle and the most popular, the cycle of life a.k.a the circle of life.

Actually, we're still surrounded by jungles. Jungles of concrete that is! Anyhow, whether we realize it or not, we have become selfish creatures of God who do not appreciate His gifts to us. This is the kind of world where we are now. We have forgotten the important things in life in order to satisfy our own selfish desires. Remember, there are consequences to each one of our acts. A simple example, if you were to  bad mouth  a friend who did nothing wrong to you just coz of some unproven rumours about him or her, that friend will lose his or her trust in you and might label you as an unreliable person as well as a back. As a consequence, should word spread that you are unreliable and a backstabbing friend, no one would want to be your friend. So, in the end you'll be lonely with no friends to rely on.

Wish I could say more, but my eyes are getting droopier by the minute! Haha! XD Anyway, what I'm trying to say here is that:




Trust me, life is more fulfilling when we contribute something to protect something we all HAVE in common. That is, the Earth. :)  

This is Erna signing off! Tut... Tut.... Tut.....

I finally did it... O_O

Okay, WHAT exactly did I finally do? Here's the thing, remember the last entry I made about three weeks ago about saying that Physics was VERY CHALLENGING? Well yeah, I just dropped the subject on 29th June 2012. Yes, just recently. Nope, yesterday to be exact. Haha! XD With an extremely heavy heart, I mustered all the strenght in my very doraemon-like body could muster and head for my Physics teacher, Mr. Chok's office. He's actually the Academic Advisor of Institute Sinaran as well. Before that, you might be wondering WHY did I have to muster all of my physical strenght instead of mental strength, am I right? Hehe. Basically, it's because my mind was made up but my legs were still at lost. What I'm trying to say is that my legs won't move. They felt heavy and for some reason UNWILLING to go meet Mr. Chok and ask for his signature. I'm guessing it's coz deep within my heart, I still want to try and learn Physics, but it's just that I don't have much time. The registration for the AS examination is in July and I don't have the time to try and catch up anymore. I have to be VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY FOCUSSED when I'm studying right now. As in make sure that whatever that I've studied and revised, I MUST be able to convey them in words, which means that the output of studying must be 100%! And if possible, 200%!

Anyway, back to the main point of this silly-sounding entry. Hehe.  XD Mr. Chok said he would advise me to study the subject for some more time and see if I can actually keep up, but since the time for payment is coming VERY soon and the deadline for handing in cash or cheques is drawing near, he said that it would be fine if I dropped Physics. I do not need Physics in my field of study anyway, so it was perfectly fine, he said. STILL~... I want to study it. TT______TT Anyway, I went to se Mr. Lee later. He's the Vice Principal and the Academic Supervisor I think. I'm not really sure. I forgot to be exact. Hehe. I told about me may not do very well in my AS, then he said something VERY encouraging that burnt the fire in my heart brighter and the will of fire that was extinguishing for the last few stressful weeks was ignited like a glowing wooden splinter placed near a test tube that has oxygen gas fuming out of it.. Ngehehehe.. XD XD XD Anyway, this was what he said:

".....No, it doesn't mean you can't do well in your AS. Now, you can focus your time and effort on these three subjects. Since you dropped Physics, you have 6 hours of free period. Use that time to go to the library and answer past year questions. Then, you can do well in your AS.... *momentary silence while my nodding my head* Don't waste your time and go to McDonald's."

                                -Mr. Lee-

It was a funny statement to make when I was kinda in despair of dropping Physics. I guess he could see it from my eyes since I look kinda a real-life walking and talking panda who looks VERY human. WAKAKAKAKA!!! Anyhow, I answered him I won't coz I always bring food from home so I don't have to waste my time on buying food. Hehe. Just so you know, McDonald's is VERY close to Institute Sinaran. You can actually walk to get there. Ngehehehe...

So, YES! As a conclusion, I dropped Physics in the end. I guess sometimes, love and passion isn't enough to get you better at certain things. You need to have talent at times. If possible, I would like to go to Physics class for fun and learn new things. Unfortunately, life is very exam-oriented. No one does what I am VERY tempted to do. But, I guess this is not completely anyone's fault coz it is through these kind of systems we are able to produce paper smart and practical smart people in various fields. Hehe. If you know what I mean. ;) Anyway, see ya in the next entries to come! ^^

Trust me, I'm Average...

WOAH. O_O I haven't posted anything for MONTHS! Hahahaha!!! Okay then, ever since I got my SPM results months ago, I've been REALLY busy. Seriously, I was! I wanted to post on a whole lot of things but several matters prevented me from doing so. Okay then, in this new entry, I'm gonna talk about what I'm doing right now. Hahaha! XD Okay, first off! I'm actually doing my A-Levels right now. What actually makes me busy is the fact that I am 3 months late for the programme! The programme started in January, but I took it in like late March? What the heck, right? Haha. XD Anyway, frankly and truthfully speaking, I am NO GENIUS. SERIOUSLY. I am as average as ever. I failed a lot of times, but of course that never became the reason for me to stop trying to get better and perhaps good results for my examinations. So, getting back to the main point, since I'm no genius, protege or any other things that are related to them, it's kind of difficult to catch up with my studies. I burnt midnight oils to study and revise as much as I can. I even go through the topics one by one so that I can get a FIRM grasp on the concepts, terminologies, procedures and such. I'm going rather slow to tell the truth. I'm actually struggling. Everyday is a battlefield for me. I never once cried about this though... I haven't shed a single tear out of my VERY panda-like eyes ever since I got my SPM results. Okay, maybe I did BUT that was because of the GREAT and "AMAZING" frustration of not being able to find any scholarship offers to those who would like to become doctors in the future. Trust me, it was VERY DIFFICULT to find one that would accept someone with my sort of results. If you know what I mean. That was the LAST TIME I shed tears for myslef and that was in either late March or early April. I haven't cried ever since. No matter how hurtful and painful things got, I never shed tears for myself anymore. Every single thing is still here inside my heart. For some reason, I can't cry for myself. I can't find a single reason that is STRONG enough to convince myself to cry so that I'll feel a lot better. I do cry sometimes, but only when I'm watching animes that saddens me. Hehehehe... XD

Anyway, I still try though. I find Physics to be VERY challenging. It requires one to fully understand a concept and then derive their own formula based on the concept, understanding and basic formula from what they've learnt. A friend of mine droppped the subject a few weeks ago coz she said she can't keep up. I thought about it too just a few days ago, frankly speaking. I'd have free periods, more time to study for Biology, Chemistry and Maths (these are the only subjects that I need so that I can further my studies to become a doctor). PLUS, Physics is not compulsory in my case. HOWEVER, hehe. I LOVE learning Physics! It's fun although difficult. XP Haha! XD Anyway, YES. I am struggling. SUFFERING in fact, but never voiced out my thoughts. I want to... Nevermind. :) Anyway, when you guys start studying later on, be grateful coz you're doing things from the very beginning. That means, you don't have to struggle like me. Use all of the oppurtunity you have and got to your advantage. YOU ARE REALLY LUCKY! Trust me, you are. :) If you are me, you'll come to understand and be VERY VERY VERY GRATEFUL to live as you! Hehe. Love your life, coz this is the only life you'll get. And most important, ALWAYS REMEMBER The Almighty Creator! :)

SPM Results ^^

ALHAMDULILLAH! ^^ I may have not gotten what my family was hoping me to get, but at least it far exceeded my expectations! Hehehe. ^^ I thought I'd get the most 4A's, but then suddenly I got 9A's? ?_? What the heck? ?_? How the hell did that happen? ?_? I was so at lost at first, then I realized: GOD~! O_O 9A'S??!!! I was like so happy, my eyes were like so opened wide! Hahaha! XD I was kinda tired and sleepy at first actually, but it all went away when I found out about my results. I got 9A's and 2B's. Good enough. :) I don't mind not getting 11A+'s coz I know my limitations and capabilities. Oh well, I better get off the laptop now. I know some may not have gotten what they expected, but then... It's not the end of the world. :) Look outside for a moment. Can you see the world? If you can, then that means the sun is still lighting the Earth with its rays. That means it's not the end of the world, am I right?

Don't give up. There's still time to make up for all that disappointments. Work hard and you'll get to where you want to be. Just believe in yourself! Then, you'll get there! ^^

SPM Results & Smile...

Well, frankly speaking I'm not nervous as I should be. I'm not sure why, but for some reason it must be because Allah granted my prayers. I prayed to Allah to give me a strong heart that would not be shakened by anything but Himself and Islam. Well, I leave it all to Allah. He knows best after all. I did try my very best. I studied as hard as I could. Nobody knows that though. :) I am determined to not cry NO MATTER WHAT. :) I will not cry what-so-ever. I'll make my heart as strong as steel. As hard as a diamond. I won't be hurt that way. I've kept too much inside my heart. My heart's bursting already. Hahaha! ^^  Like I said, I won't cry. No matter how hurtful it is to laugh things off despite sad and depressing things, I WON'T CRY!! I'll be strong for my sake! I'll be strong! I'll be strong no matter what! No one believes in me anyway, so I'll just have to believe in myself. No one has faith in me, so I'll just have to have faith in myself. :) I'll smile no matter what. I am said of a lot of things. Negative things. :) It hurts, but I... I won't stop smiling. :) I'll smile till the end of my life, no matter the circumstances I'm in. :) I'll keep on smiling and smiling. I won't stop. Even if tears are welling up in my eyes, I'll stay smiling. I will. :')

I'm talking more about smiling and laughing, I know. Hahaha! ^^ Sadness is nesting in my heart at the moment. I can't concentrate on talking about SPM. Ngehehe. ^^ Anyway, I'm gonna cool down for awhile. :) I need to heal this heart that's been aching ever since it's very young. :') Gotta go people. I'm too sad to blog anything. Sorry about that...